Homeschool Conference

Just got back from a great homeschool conference in our capitol city.

It was enlightening.
It was fun.
It was exhausting.

Favorite things and greatest discoveries:

• My kids got to run and play and be kids. They played American football and ultimate frisbee. They weren't stared at or photographed. They could just be kids.
• I played games....games that involved not knowing the rules, painting the faces of the losers, and late nights. I laughed until my face hurt...bliss.
• I am proud of my kiddos.
• I learned I want to challenge them even more. I want to begin specializing in their interests and allow them to explore even deeper into what they love.
• My friends who homeschool are really amazing. They are doing some awesome stuff. They are my greatest resource.
• My kids got to have Slurpees.
• I got to have Starbucks. :)
• I was inspired.
• I don't like traveling without Louie. 

I leave again tomorrow. We're off on a visa run. I love my life.

Love from the islands,

Twyla

Day Twenty-Four: Chloe and Sam

Sometimes people ask me how I could take my children all the way around the world. How could I take them away from good schools and hospitals etc. etc. I hope these random pics of Chloe and Sam growing up here in the islands will answer that question. We love it here and I love the  things my children are learning on this adventure. 

 Sam learned to climb a coconut tree when he was five years old. Of course this overprotective mamma won't let him climb higher than ten feet. :)

 Every year my kiddos get to go to an amazing camp. Here we are climbing next to a volcano. Have any of you ever climbed a volcano? It's super exciting.

 My kids have made friends with people from different cultures. They have learned to eat spicy foods and are learning a different language.

 They are learning that most of the world's children do not have running water, enough food or even toys. They are learning to appreciate all the wonderful things we do have in the States. 

 Riding a motorcycle would be worth living overseas for both of them. They love it. :)

 Here's Chloe helping with an English Club.

Good friends make it that much more fun.

You can never see enough sea turtles. 

 Exploring an awesome tree.

Canoeing in one of the biggest crater lakes in the world.

I'm grateful for the chance to chase Jesus to this place. And I am grateful that my children are growing up learning about Him and how He has a plan for their life. His plan is not something to be afraid of, it's something to be chased after with all that we are. He is to be enjoyed along the Way.

Love from the islands,

Twyla

Day Twenty-Three: Movie Quotes

It crossed my mind yesterday that I have used a lot of movie quotes over that last twenty-three days. By a lot I mean three...

*From day four:
Do you remember that part at the end of "Return of the King" where Sam is trying to encourage Frodo? That's how Louie is with me in regard to all my weaknesses but especially with my "weight weakness."  Sam says, "Then let us be rid of it...once and for all!  Come on, Mr. Frodo.  I can't carry it for you...but I can carry you!" 

* From day twelve:

Do you remember that scene in Captain America where Dr. Erskine says, "The serum amplifies everything that is inside. So good becomes great and bad becomes worse." Well, my "serum" amplified everything that was bad in me. 


* From day twenty-one:
as Iris says in The Holiday, "You're supposed to be the leading lady in your own life." :)

It seemed like more than three. But I guess that's because I think about movie quotes all the time. They help me narrate my life. I hear a voice over in my head that describes what is going on around me. Is that strange? Ha! It seems strange as I type this out.

I wonder why I do that? I mean, I love movies...LOVE movies. But why do the words stick with me the way they do? I regularly quote Braveheart with Louie. It's one of our favorite movies...if the coffee is a little strong in the morning a good boisterous, "That'll wake you up in the morning, boys!" jumps out of my mouth. Or if I'm leaving Chloe alone with some friends at the mall, in my mind I'm thinking, "You stay alive, no matter what occurs! I will find you. No matter how long it takes, no matter how far, I will find you!" from The Last of the Mohicans. Yes, overprotective mom here. And then one of my favorites, if we are walking outside and the kids are complaining about a little exercise I'll start running and yell, "There's some blue sky. Let us chase it!" from Sense and Sensibility. 


Yes, I'm a dork. Did I mention I am the quirky leading lady of my own life? Emphasis on quirky. 


I wonder if the reason I think about movies is because movies echo a great need in my life. I have a need for my life to matter. I want it to be exciting, romantic and adventurous. But if movies echo a need in my life then what propels movies? I mean why are romances and adventures so popular? Why do we pay good money to watch other people risk, fall in love or rescue others?


In The Life You've Always Wanted, John Ortberg writes, "Frederick Buechner once wrote that every age has produced fairy tales. Something inside us believes or wants to believe, that the world as we know it is not the whole story. We long for the reenchantment of reality...So we keep spinning and repeating stories that hold the promise of another world." He continues, " Fairy tales are not just stories about the transformation of the world around us. They are usually about the transformation of the central characters: frogs becoming princes, ugly ducklings becoming swans..."


I want to see transformation in my life. I want to be the risk-taker. I want to be the one that goes behind enemy lines and rescues the orphans (that was a Monday Night movie I saw when I was 12 years old and has always stuck with me). Why? Because all of us have been created to live by faith. Life in the Spirit is about taking risks and following Jesus. We watch movies many times to live vicariously through the main characters. Watching others take risks may meet a surface level need for our own faith deficiencies. 


The amazing thing about Jesus is that we don't have to just watch others live by faith. We don't have to be spectators in our own lives. You are the hero of your own story. You are the leading man or leading lady of your own life. Like I said before, I imagine Jesus running from broken person to broken person and looking back to see if we will chase Him to meet their needs...to love them...to get messy and be involved.


Look around you. Where is Jesus? What's He calling you to do with/in your life? I guarantee it will be more exciting than any movie. 


But I will continue to pilfer movie lines. Hollywood people are just better writers than I am. :) 


Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Twenty-Two: Our Story Part 2

**Here is the continuation of yesterday's story**

I quickly told my roommates my suspicions and told them that Louie was on his way over right then. We (all seven of us at this point) stopped and prayed that Jesus would give me the words to say to Louie if he did ask me to back out of the commitment. When Louie arrived they all waited in another room praying for me and our conversation...

Louie was definitely nervous. He was sweating and his voice was shaky. We sat down and he began to ask me questions about our commitment. He asked me if any other men had asked me out during this year. I had to admit that yes there were a couple of guys hanging around in the fringes. (I am rather embarrassed to write that...it's not like what it sounds like. I was just so full of following Jesus and I think it was truly attractive to some guys.) Anyway...He then wiped his palms on his legs and said, "Twyla, would you go out with me..." Now, I must tell you that my heart dropped. I was disappointed in Louie and I prayed for wisdom.

But Louie wasn't finished, "...in seven months." Wait. What? Could you repeat that? "Twyla, would you go out with me...in seven months?" He shared with me that he had been praying and waiting to tell me about his feelings until after our commitment, but he had noticed that there were other guys waiting also. He wanted, if I was agreeable, to give the other guys the message to back off. He wanted them to know that I was spoken for.

Swoon! Are you kidding me?! Are you for real?! My heart had just been through the ringer. I had moved from disappointment to absolute head over heels in love. Of course I told him that I would date him in seven months and that yes I was agreeable to getting the message out to the other guys to back off. :)

Last night I asked Louie about this conversation again. I wanted to get the facts straight. He told me that  he had been praying for his wife. And as he and I learned more and more about each other, he hoped Jesus was allowing him to become best friends with his future wife. He wanted to be married and have children and our commitment had allowed him to see the real me, not the "dating" me. And remember, he had not been discipled in the "wait and see" teaching of the single guys at church. He had been discipled in the "hard knocks" of real life and he was ready to get on with the life Jesus had for him. He was ready to step out in faith.

We decided that we would not go out alone together and we would immediately tell our friends about this new development. My roommates were still waiting and praying for us in the next room. When Louie left and I told them all about our conversation they were asking if Louie had any single brothers. :) Louie was being discipled by one of our closet friends. We decided to tell him and our pastor (my mentor). But soon our entire fellowship knew about "Louie and Twyla." One of my roommates said, "I want to NOT date someone. It looks like a lot of fun." :) It WAS a lot of fun.

One of my worries throughout this time was how young Louie was in Jesus. I had not thought of Louie initially as being "open" for dating after our commitment was over because of his newness in Jesus. I approached my mentor/pastor about it. I will never forget his answer. He shared with me that it's not how long someone has known Jesus that matters, it's how they follow Him, how they love His Word and how they obey Him. He said, "There are many, many men out there that have known Jesus a long time, but they are not passionate about Him or follow Him with everything they are. Louie is the type of man I would want you to marry. Do not marry a man who has known Jesus for a long time, but does not obey Him."

Of course, I was thrilled with that advice and it continues to be a theme in my life. I long for single women who love Jesus never to settle for a man that just "knows" Jesus. Wait for the man that passionately loves and follows Him. The man that pursues Jesus will pursue you. And if for some reason all the men around you are disobeying Jesus, it is much better to chase Jesus alone than to try and drag along someone else.

Ok, enough preaching...

Our first date was on September 17, 1994. It was pretty funny. It seemed like our entire fellowship knew we were going out alone for our official first date that day. Of course we were nervous, but it was perfect. We talked about all kinds of things we had not allowed ourselves to say in the past seven months. We knew we loved each other and actually began planning our wedding that day. :) It was a very easy transition from best friends to being in love. Looking back I wish we had married right away. When you find your life, you want it to begin at once. :) We married on December 15, 1995.

So what do you think? Pretty romantic, huh? As I've stated before we all have these types of stories. I'm just getting to write mine down.  I am grateful to be able to write out these Team Castro tales. They are memories that we hold dear around here and until this month I had never thought about writing them down. It's actually quite fun. I don't want to forget what Jesus has done and most of all I don't want my children to forget. I want them to remember Jesus can redeem any story. He can make any story a romance because He is the great Lover. We've all had crazy beginnings and shaky midlife stories but if we belong to Him and passionately follow Him, He will give each and everyone of us a happy ending because He has promised to never leave us nor forsake us. (Heb 13:6).

Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Twenty-One: Our Story

I've been saving this story. It's one of my favorites. It's up there with the birth of my children and the day I gave my life to Jesus. I hold this story in my heart like a treasure. I've told it to all my friends, acquaintances and even complete strangers. My children ask me to tell this story at least once a year. It's one of their favorites too. This the story of how my latin man and I fell in love. This is the story of our romance.

I've alluded to this story before. I've told you about Louie praying for a wife when he was single and I've told you how I gave Jesus a year of not dating. But I want to give you the full narrative now. I want to fill in the holes, give you the back story and share the whole romance with you. I love telling this story and I hope you will enjoy it too. Maybe you should go get a cup of coffee and put on your pajamas. This is the kind of romance you curl up with and enjoy. At least it's the kind I savor. There's a handsome hero and quirky leading lady...as Iris says in The Holiday, "You're supposed to be the leading lady in your own life." :)

In 1993 I moved to Los Angeles, California. It was a big move for me. I was looking for my life. I was a kindergarten teacher in Dallas, Texas and was in danger of living a normal life. I say this not to minimize a life of being a teacher, but I knew deep in my heart that I wanted more. God had called me to something bigger than myself and I had yet to find it. Los Angeles had the promise of adventure and I was up for an adventure. We are created to live by faith. We are asked to believe that there is more to life than living for ourselves. I wanted that so desperately. There were reasons for choosing LA for my adventure. It wasn't completely without it's safety nets. My mentors in Dallas had moved to LA and I was following them. In California I connected myself to an amazing fellowship. This fellowship taught me (and continues to teach me) what life on the Way is all about. My mentors invested heavily in me and I was growing in my walk with Jesus.

I lived with five other women and our house was the meeting place for a singles small group. This small group was different than any other I had ever been apart of. These people were your every day young professionals. And yet many of them lived for others to know Jesus. They were outward focused and I was excited to be around other people that wanted to serve Jesus. That first night of small group, after we had begun, the door bell rang. I went to answer the door. There standing in the doorway was the most beautiful Mexican man I had ever laid eyes on. Music began to play and...Ha! Just kidding. It was Louie at the door, but I really didn't notice anything about him other than the fact that he sat in a corner all night with his hands folded over his chest and a great big scowl on his face. Louie says he remembers me that night because I made a big fool of myself. We were to illustrate some verses in the Bible with some sort of creative expression. Our group decided to use a blues song to express our verses. It was not pretty.

Yesterday I gave you the story of how Louie came to repentance and belief in Jesus. He was so fun to watch in those first days of radical forgiveness. He was experiencing everything in a fresh way, grateful for his new life and enjoying every single thing about walking with Jesus.

During this time of Louie's new beginning in Jesus I was going through my own craziness. Jesus was cleaning me up and getting me ready for the life he wanted for me. I shared about my fast from dating on day eight. In short, I felt that Jesus was calling me to give up dating so that I could truly learn how to completely depend on Him to meet my needs.

In our singles' small group I shared that I was going to give God a year and not date. I did this for two reasons. I wanted accountability from my friends and I wanted to get the word out to the single guys that I was off limits. :) At this time in our singles group there was quite a bit of informal dating going on.

That night in small group Louie was surprised at my confession and commitment. He was just a baby in Jesus...maybe 6 weeks in the Lord at that point. But the idea of not dating for a year to learn how to better follow Jesus appealed to him. He didn't know how to go about the dating thing in Jesus and wanted a good year off too. So, you guessed it, he gave Jesus a year. He decided to follow my example and not date for an entire year.  He shared with our small group and they decided as a group to be our accountability.

That was one of the best years of my life. We had so much fun. Our small group did life together. We hiked, went to movies, went to the beach and hung out at Baker's Square until the wee hours of the mornings. We shared Jesus with our co-workers and helped each other reach out to those without Jesus. My roommates and I hosted a meal each week where the only requirement for joining was bringing someone who needed encouragement. Louie went to those dinners frequently.

That year Louie and I became best friends. We realized that we both loved hiking. We both spoke Spanish, loved asian food and The Gipsy Kings. We didn't do these things on dates but in groups of friends. There was no pressure to be perfect. We (all of us) learned the good the bad and the ugly about each other and it was what I imagine the first church was like.

Fast forward four or five months into our dating fast. Unknown to me, Louie began to think about what it would be like for he and I to date each other. He says that at our Christmas party that year he began to fall in love with me. I honestly don't remember much of that Christmas party or even seeing Louie much that night. He was parking cars and shuttling people so they could enjoy the party. I was one of the MC's of the party and was busy entertaining. By the way, that pretty much is the best example of our personalities. Louie is parking cars and serving while I am the center of attention.

He says that he began to think and pray about our future. He called me one night soon after that party and asked me if he could come over and talk. On the phone he sounded very strange. I was immediately put on the defensive and began to suspect something was up. It worried me to think that Louie would so quickly (we still had seven months left) give up on a commitment we had made to our Jesus. Yes, it was true that we were best friends. Yes, he was the person I talked most about that Christmas at home and yes, I couldn't deny that I didn't ever want to think about my life without him. But I didn't want to give up on our commitment to not date for a year.

I quickly told my roommates my suspicions and told them that Louie was on his way over right then. We (all seven of us at this point) stopped and prayed that Jesus would give me the words to say to Louie if he did ask me to back out of the commitment. When Louie arrived they all waited in another room praying for me and our conversation...

...To be continued. :)

Love from the islands,
Twyla

P.S. Ha! Sorry about that. :) I have always wanted to stop a story right in the best part...this was getting too long anyway. I'll finish it up tomorrow.

Day Twenty: Louie

**I have been given full permission to share this with you. :) Sorry, it's kind of long.

Can I take a day to tell you Louie's story? You know he's one of my favorite topics. I respect him more than any other person on this planet. He is my hero and I want to tell you how he came to know Jesus.

Louie grew up in LA. He spoke only Spanish until he went to kindergarten. He grew up in the Catholic church and went through Catechism and took his first Holy Communion.

In Jr. High, Louie began to be interested in gangs. He was drawn to the idea of being a part of something...to be included. He did not have a good relationship with his own father and the gangs offered him an escape from his home life and dysfunction.

When Louie was eleven or twelve years old he started drinking alcohol. At thirteen he used marijuana for the first time. This snowballed into a lifestyle of alcoholism and experimental drug usage that lasted well over fifteen years.

LA in the seventies was a crazy place. During these years, Louie transitioned from the Cholo gang to a fraternity of Chicano friends. These terms are pregnant with meaning, but I don't have time or space to define them for you. Just click on the links if you want to know more about what they mean. During this time Louie and his friends were heavy into the LA clubbing scene. This lifestyle included a lot of violence because they were usually in the wrong place at the wrong time. Testosterone mixed with women, drugs and alcohol became a recipe for many, many violent encounters.

It is a miracle that Louie was not killed during this time of his life. Not only was he involved in violence but he also drove while drinking. He totaled his car and spent a night in jail for a DUI.

His life deteriorated to the point that he could not get high anymore. No matter how much alcohol he drank or how many drugs he put into his system, he could not numb his pain. Louie realized that he would end up dead if something didn't change. So he enrolled himself in rehab and got clean and sober.

The first years of sobriety, Louie focused on becoming a healthy member of society. During all the years of alcohol and drug abuse, Louie was still able to keep a stable job as an operations manager. But he was not a good employee. Now he focused on working hard and making a good living. He tried to become a good person.

After four years of being clean and trying to be good, Louie began to have thoughts that the sober life was no better than being drunk. In AA they have a term for this, it's called being a "Dry Drunk."It means that nothing other than the lack of alcohol had changed. It was just a matter of time before he took another drink. He acknowledges now that if he had taken that drink, he would probably be dead.

At this time a follower of Jesus began working at Louie's company. She was different than anyone Louie had ever met. She was free. He knew immediately that she did not live under the same "rules" that he lived under. She invited him to a small group in our fellowship.

Louie began attending our fellowship. At first we all thought he hated small group. He would sit in a corner with his arms crossed and scowl at us. You know he can be intimidating. :) But little by little we began to see that he was looking for Jesus. Or more accurately that Jesus was pursuing him. Louie speaks of being drawn to believers and to the Word of God. It was like nothing he had ever experienced before. He knew in his spirit that the truth of what he looked for in Cholos and Chicanos was in this vagabond broken group of follower's of Jesus.

One time we played volleyball as a small group and Louie couldn't remember which park we had decided to play in. He shares how he was frantic to get to us. Not because of playing volleyball, but because he wanted to be around people that followed Jesus.

We all shared with Louie many times. He wanted to follow Jesus but at first he struggled with the idea of becoming a follower. Did this mean he had to turn his back on his family and heritage? To be Mexican is to be Catholic. What happens when you stop being Catholic? Do you stop being Mexican? It was a real struggle at first. But the more Louie read God's Word, the more he wanted Jesus.

Finally, on July 25, 1993, Louie gave his life to Jesus in the Baker's Square on Beverly Blvd. He and our pastor had gone to lunch together after church one Sunday and there on that crowded Sunday afternoon, Louie knew his Savior.

Many changes happened after that. Louie cleaned out his apartment of paraphernalia he was still holding onto. He sold an extensive gun collection (reminders of the violence) and began to make amends and ask forgiveness of those he had hurt.

The most confusing part for his parents was when Louie was baptized. They were unsure and hurt by his turning away from Catholicism. But they could not deny the huge changes they saw in his life.

One of the hardest things for Louie was to quit smoking. It took him three months of throwing away cigarettes and then returning to them again and again. He went back and forth until he completely released them to Jesus.

Louie forgave his father. He reconciled his relationship with his older brother who he hadn't spoken to in several years. And he told his family all about his relationship with Jesus.

The prevailing thought was, I have been forgiven so much. How can I not forgive anyone else?

"Even though I was once...a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners-of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on Him and receive eternal life."  (I Tim 1:13-16)

Anyone who knows Louie now, knows that he is the gentlest and kindest of men. The Lord has redeemed what was death and He has given Louie life. Jesus is his life.

I pray Louie's story is an example to you of Jesus' mercy and patience. There are none too far gone that the grace of Jesus cannot reach them.

Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Nineteen: Overwhelmed

**Extra bonus points if you can count how many times I use the phrase, "freaked out."

This blog is getting out of my control. In the first two weeks of this crazy commitment I have been having fun sharing with you all from my heart. It has been cathartic to release my ideas to you in this format. However, everyday more and more of you are "tuning in" to my nonsensical ramblings and it's starting to freak me out. At first I imagined my sister reading my blog each day and I just wrote as if she and I were having coffee in her kitchen.

But blogger has this thing called "Stats." It's little bits of information and lots and lots of graphs. The graphs show me what countries you all live in, what posts you are reading and worst of all how many of you are paying attention to this experiment each day. This is the part that is making me nervous. It's not just my sister and me in her kitchen anymore. In fact, it's getting kind of crowded in here.

I find myself fluctuating between extreme pressure to perform and a desire to hide and not come out. You might be asking, "What did you expect? This is the internet for goodness sake!" Do you use phrases like "goodness sake?" Because in my imagination, you do. And yes, you're right. What WAS I thinking?

I wasn't thinking. I was just doing. I'm a shoot then aim kind of gal. I "do" first then think. I really relate to Peter in the gospels. I want to be like the mature Peter in Acts, but I'm more along the lines of the "speak before thinking" Peter of the gospels. Peter is famous for his spontaneous outbursts, isn't he?

And yet, Peter was the first to jump out of the boat and walk on water because he moved before thinking. His spontaneous outburst was to run to Jesus, even if Jesus was standing in the middle the sea. He believed and moved while others were thinking. He experienced the joy of seeing His Jesus AND walking on water! In fact, when he started thinking he started sinking. No, I'm not purposefully trying to sound like Dr. Suess.

This blog is my spontaneous outburst. I asked Jesus, "What do you want me to do or not do for thirty days? I'll give up coffee if you ask me to, Jesus." But Jesus didn't ask me to give up coffee (huge sigh of relief). He asked me to blog for thirty straight days...to write out my heart. Without thinking I jumped in with both feet. Not a graceful thought out dive, but an unattractive full blown cannon ball.

And now, here I am in the middle of this sea of blogs. And I am beginning to look at the storm...What am I doing?...Where is this going?...Why are all these people reading this?... I'm tempted to take my eyes off of my Jesus and look at the storm. I'm tempted to give up. Because the truth is...I don't KNOW where this is going.

But I know if I keep my eyes on Jesus, I don't have to worry. I want a different ending to my story. What if Peter would have kept his eyes on Jesus and kept walking with Him? Where would they have gone? What would Jesus have said to Peter? I want to find out. He draws me to move with Him. He calls me to risk with Him and He smiles at me the whole way.

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith..." (Heb 12:1-2a)


You all are my cloud of witnesses. Ahhh! That really freaks me out. But I will throw off this doubt that is tangling me all up and I will run the race Jesus has marked out for me. I will fix my eyes on Him and not be moved. 


Will you walk with me on this adventure? I hope so. It freaks me out, but I really do like a crowded kitchen. The more the merrier, (insert squeaky voice) right?


Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Eighteen: Call to Single Men Part 2

**Sorry about the fiasco of day seventeen. I've told you all before that I don't really know what I'm doing and I just proved it to you all yesterday. :)

I need some comedy relief today and this video hit the spot. On day seven I made a call to single men and said that Louie should lead a boot camp for said men. If he did do such a crazy thing, I think this video would be part of the curriculum. :)

Enjoy! This is some good stuff.

Love from the islands,

Twyla

Day Sixteen: Spiritual Disciplines

This morning I have been thinking about spiritual disciplines. Is that supposed to be capitalized? Spiritual Disciplines...in my imagination they are capitalized because they seem so stern and adult-like. I've been afraid of "Spiritual Disciplines" (said in a loud deep voice). The words conjure up visions of crazy-eyed priests beating themselves with whips. I have an active imagination. I'm fairly certain I have lost track of what they truly are and what their purpose is in the believer's life.

Don't get me wrong. I do know something about them. I'm a freed legalist, so I have studied them and tried to follow them much of my life. But they were a list of rules to follow.  If I fast, am silent (Ha!), study, confess, etc, etc...I will be...what will I be?...good?...accepted?...mature?

January is the "discipline" month, right? Isn't this the month we get back on the wagon in regard to eating, exercise, finances, Bible reading plans...Maybe that's why I am thinking about Spiritual Disciplines. I do know that there is something about them that draws me. What is it?

I want to be like Jesus. I want to know Him more and I know that the true goal of Spiritual Disciplines is Jesus Himself. So where do I start? The scriptures are a good place. Yesterday I read that Jesus was made perfect through suffering (Heb 2:10). Umm...I'm getting the vision of that crazy priest again. Lord, help! How do I find You through discipline when I am so afraid of suffering?

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matt 11:28:29)


Is the goal to rest in Jesus? Through Spiritual Disciplines will I find that He has a better "yoke" than I can imagine...even with my imagination? I do want to learn from Him. 


I'm going to embark on a quest to find out what Spiritual Disciplines are all about. Do you want to join me? I just got the book, The Life You've Always Wanted by John Ortberg. It's about Spiritual Disciplines and comes highly recommended by many people. Have any of you read it? What are your thoughts? I liked the book review I read about it. It said, "The disciplines are neither taskmasters nor an end in themselves. Rather they are exercises that build strength and endurance for the road of growth."


I like that. Sigh. I can do that. I will take on Jesus' work for me and will learn from Him. I can trust Him.


Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Fifteen: A Worn, Taped Up Little NIV

Today I read Hebrews 1-6. Yes, I am still finishing up my Bible reading plan of 2011. I just can't seem to read through the letters to the church in quick succession. There is so much meat in these small books (well in the whole Bible, right?) and it is taking me much longer than what the reading plan suggests. But as I've stated before, the reading plan is a guide and I'm going to take these last days slowly, savoring the words and the conviction it is producing in my soul.

"For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any double edged-sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow, it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." (Hebrews 4:12)

Isn't it amazing that we have access to the Word of God? What a blessing and a treasure. Sometimes in the mornings I will just sit with the Bible in my hand and look at it. What joy fills my soul as I think that I am about to read God's words to me for today. Many mornings I am brought to tears as I drink my coffee and think of the wonderful privilege that is mine to have the entire word of God at my finger tips.

What will you say today, Jesus? What promise do you have for me? What needs changing? What warning do you have for me? These are all whispered prayers that escape my lips as I hold my worn, taped up little NIV.

It's exciting to think about meeting Jesus everyday in His Word. We can be assured that He WILL speak each and everyday. Yes, there are dry times that inevitably come along. But even in those times I can look back at my journal and see that He just kept repeating a word to me until I obeyed it. What I thought was a dry time was really just Jesus waiting on me to move with Him.

One morning when Chloe and Sam were four and two, I read Psalm 118. When I read this encouraging Psalm, my heart began to feel that the Lord was really warning me to take courage for that day. I sensed that something difficult would happen soon.

5 In my anguish I cried to the Lord, and he answered by setting me free.

6 The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?

7 The Lord is with me; he is my helper. I will look in triumph on my enemies.

8 It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.

The Psalm goes on and on about the Lord's help, strength and salvation. There are shouts of joy and victory because the Lord has brought the Psalmist through a difficult battle with his enemies. And then there is:

17 I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the Lord has done.

Louie was laid off work that day from a job he had had for seventeen years. When Louie called me to tell me, I was not crushed or even fearful.  I was actually excited. What was God doing? What did he have in store for us? I felt in my spirit that Jesus was paving the way for us to finally go overseas, and "proclaim what the Lord has done." The Lord had not only prepared me for the news but had instilled in me a sense of joy and expectation.  That was two years before Louie got on the plane to Southeast Asia to work in the tsunami zone. Praise Him!

"How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!" (Psalm 119:103)

Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Fourteen: Chloe

Chloe has a heart to adopt. She has been after me and Louie to adopt a baby since she was four or five years old. She has the gift of mercy. She has a heart to feed the hungry. She has a heart to give medical care to those without it. She has a heart for the world.

Knowing all of this about Chloe, my friend Jana, asked me if I had heard about Katie Davis, the young woman in the video below. She is following her Jesus as best as she knows how. She is an inspiration. Please watch it, but be warned. You will be left desiring more from your life and for your life.

When I first watched this I thought, Katie is the perfect person for that job. God created her to love and show mercy. God created her for the perfect work at the perfect time. But isn't that true for all of us? Hasn't he created us all to do good works created for us in Christ Jesus (Eph 2:10)?

What is it He has created you to do? Is there a dream you have had, but have not chased after it? Is there something Jesus has called you to do, but you think it too extreme or crazy? If it is biblical and it is from Him, there is nothing He can't do through you.

Katie is a great role model for my Chloe. I want to put before her all kinds of people who are following Jesus passionately. Chloe has already asked me if we can volunteer for Amazima ministries with Katie. We're going to be following this young woman with much interest in the coming years.

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurable more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Eph 3:20-21)

"...throughout all generations..." You are never too young or too old to chase your Jesus. Let's see where He leads us! Won't this be fun?!!

Love from the islands,

Twyla

Day Thirteen: Chasing Jesus

"I run in the paths of your commands for you have set my heart free." (Psalm 119:32)

This verse has become, over the years, our family theme. It is what we fall back on whenever we are facing difficult choices and decisions. We first used it to help us make the decision to come to Southeast Asia.

The tsunami of 2004 devastated many parts of Southeast Asia. Louie was glued to the television set that Christmas night of 2004. His heart was torn and broken over the loss of life and physical destruction. But what could we do sitting in Los Angeles? There was a need for immediate action and we were stuck in middle class American life. Three weeks after the tsunami Louie was on a plane to Southeast Asia.

Why? What could possibly motivate a man to pick up and leave like that? Only Jesus can do that. Only following Him with all you have can cause grown people to change their entire lives and redirect all their efforts.  In our family we call it, "Chasing Jesus." Whenever there is a call to do something that is beyond ourselves or our ability, we call each other to, "run in the paths of His commands for He has set our hearts free." We want to live in a constant state of gratefulness that causes the hardships or trials of following Him to dim in the presence of His glorious grace in our lives.

"Chasing Jesus," doesn't that sound fun? I imagine playing "Chase" with Jesus. He's laughing and running to broken person after broken person looking to see if we will follow Him in this marvelous adventure. Will we camp on the beach in a broken part of the tsunami devastation? Will we get eaten up by bugs and be taken advantage of by those we trust in the culture? Yes! Because we chase Him. We long to continue on the adventure with Him.

These verses have also set in motion a desire to not "straddle the fence" of obedience. Many times I find myself looking at the other side...you know the "grass is greener," other side. I know Jesus has called me to this side of the fence, but boy, that other side can sure look good. This life of always wanting the other side can be life-draining. If I am lingering at the fence looking at what I want instead of running in His commands I am missing that great adventure of His path. I want to leave the fence and run as far as I can in His commands. Why? Because He has set my heart free.

What waits for me at the end of the path? Jesus! "...set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed." I see glimpses of Him and it moves me forward..."Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls." (1 Peter 1:8-9, 13)

Do my writings seem like "pie in the sky" sometimes? I worry about that. That you will think I am just an emotional, crazy person. But then verses like the one above remind me that I AM out of my mind and that I do love Him and am filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy. My inadequate words are just the tip of the iceberg of trying to describe what is inexpressible.

Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Nine: A Call to Families

God sets the lonely in families... Psalm 68:6


Yesterday I called single women to connect to a family they respect to help with loneliness. But as I thought through that advice it struck me that many would find that intimidating. Initiating a relationship or asking for a family to care for them and invest in them would be awkward. I still stand by that advice as I think it is important to put yourselves in places you can meet and get to know families (as in a small group or serving at a fellowship). But I think the bulk of the responsibility for investing in lonely people falls on the families themselves.


When my kiddos were small I struggled with the prevailing "spiritual" teaching of that time, "my family is my ministry." On the surface this has an appearance of wisdom. We should care for our families. We should make them a priority. But the underlying thought is, "I am exempt from other responsibilities because I am caring for a family." How will our children learn to love others, serve others and bear with others if they do not see it lived out in our own lives? Now, before you get angry with me, :/ let me say that I am not talking about leading a time consuming ministry in your fellowship. I am talking of looking for those around you that need the love of a family. Can I give you some examples?

• When I was in high school we lived near a big Naval base. During the holidays my mom would have young men over who had no where else to go. That example has influenced me so much. I long for the lonely ones around me to have a place to call home during the holidays. My mom did not lead a great ministry, she worked full time. But she left a great legacy in my life to look for the lonely. 

• My dad was always trying to get us to serve at homeless shelters. As teenagers we were very resistant. But one year he forced us to go on Thanksgiving. Of course it was a knock in the head for me. I later worked in an inner city with all kinds of homeless people. My mom and dad's convictions were that their family was their ministry. Their ministry was to teach us how to love and serve the lonely. They shaped me and my siblings to be outward focused and to reach out beyond ourselves.

• My sister takes her kids to clean and work in an inner city school. She has taken responsibility to invest in a girl at that school. For at least 5 years she has been her friend, provided her needs and shared Jesus with her.  

• When Chloe and Sam were babies we had international students live with us. Yes, it was more work and yes there were times I wanted it to be just Louie, the kids and me. But there were also times of great joy as we got to know these young people and introduced them to the love of Jesus and the love of a family. Chloe and Sam were introduced to new cultures and new food. They loved these students who gave me time to cook dinner many nights because they played with my babies.

• I love the trend these days in followers of Jesus to legally adopt children. It is biblical and it is beautiful.

Dear friends, this is SO important. There is a world of lonely people desperate for the love of a family. Allowing people into our lives can disturb our schedules, take our energy and drive us crazy. But is there anything more glorious than giving up my desires to follow Him?

What are your giftings and passions? How can you use those to bless others? Here are some ideas of how to serve others with your children. This is just a small list:

1. Take a meal to a sick neighbor.
2. Invite a single to your home for dinner. Consider investing in them. Go for coffee, play games...
3. Take a meal to homeless person who is begging.
4. Invite those who have no place to go for the holidays into your traditions.
5. Find out about international students in your area. Go looking for them. They don't know how to find you.
6. What can you do for a single mom? Mow her lawn? Watch her kids? Give her a day to herself?
7. Find a refugee ministry and volunteer.

I want my children to see me care for others, have them in my home, serve them and love them. I want them to know that Jesus is real, His Word is real and following Him is an adventure. It's a risk. It's life-giving.

Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Eight: A Call to Single Women

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23


When I was single, I was BOY CRAZY! That is to say internally I was boy (or relationship) crazy. Outwardly I looked like a very content happy go lucky girl who was perfectly happy being single. Internally, however, I was constantly on the look out for the "cute" guy. I think the term is "hot" these days. This is a pretty universal malady. Most single women will not admit it, but we all suffer from it at some point or other.


Here are the symptoms of boy craziness: When you enter a room at work or church your eyes are scanning to look for who is there. When alone your thoughts are on your last relationship or the desire for the next one. You watch tv shows like the Bachelor or Bachelorette (yes, you're out there whether you admit it or not), you settle for dating (or marrying) a dud because you want a relationship so badly. You want to be chosen. So much so that you put yourself in all kinds of situations just waiting for someone to "choose" you.


In my boy craziness God called me to LA. While in LA God began to ever so gently show me that in the state of always looking for a relationship, I was missing out on the treasure and joy of His relationship with me. I was convicted that so much of my time and energy went to thinking about possibilities in dating that there was nothing of consequence left for Him. He asked me to give Him my heart completely. He was jealous for me.


I knew myself. I knew that the only way I could totally give my heart to Him would be to take a fast from dating...not that I was dating. I wasn't. But the possibility of dating was always a lure and I knew if I took away the possibility then I would be more likely to focus on my Jesus. So, I gave Him a year.


What did I learn in that year? I learned that He is enough. He is the giver of all good things and that I would much rather follow Him alone that be stuck in a marriage with "Joe Blow church-goer." I learned that my "list of what I wanted in a husband" (don't we all have those?) was so far below Jesus' list for my husband. His list is all about Him! And best of all, I knew that He chose me before the foundations of the world were set. He chose me. He longed for me.


Based on these truths...I call you, dear single friends, guard your hearts, set your hearts on things above.


Some of you may be thinking that those are hollow words for your soul right now. You are hurt. You are lonely. Please know that I get it. I remember the tears. I remember the loneliness. But there are some things in life that we must believe in even when all circumstances and "feelings" prove otherwise.


I don't want to leave you with just a "pep-talk." Here are a few practical ideas that may help you in your loneliness. These are in no particular order:


1. Connect yourself to a strong, Biblical fellowship.
2. Serve in that fellowship. 
3. Connect to an outward focused small group. Outward focused people are great to hang around with. You learn to think of others and think less of your circumstances.
4. Connect to a family. Look for a family you respect and look up to. Hang out with them and learn how they interact. Over the years Jesus has given us some "adopted daughters." Those women have become family to us. I think I need to write "A Call to Families" so that they will love on single women. If you find it hard to do this one, contact me. I would love to have at least an email or facebook friendship with you.
5. Stay in the Word. Stay connected to your Jesus. He is yours. He has chosen you.


I love you, friends. I long for you. I pray that you might have power to grasp how wide and how long and how high and how deep is the love of Jesus (Eph 3:18).


Love from the islands,
Twyla

Day Seven: A Call To Single Men

My Latin Man is a Marine. You never say, "was a Marine." Because once a Marine, always a Marine. He's tough, he's disciplined and he's serious. He was a door gunner which is that cool job of sitting in the side of a helicopter with a ginormous gun. It's one of the many reasons I fell in love with him. He's just so tough and manly.

I've been thinking lately that Louie should run a boot camp for single men. We need someone to take on the responsibility of shaping young men today. Let me say that I feel for single men of this generation because they have not been taught the art of godly manliness ("the art of manliness" is a term I got from a website of the same name). Since my single/dating days I have observed a real deficit in the discipleship and training of single men.

When Louie was a new believer he was in a prayer group of single men who had all been believers for some time. He shared with this group of single men that he wanted to be married and asked their advice. The single men told him to pray about it. They had all been praying for their future wives for some time. So Louie prayed. He asked God to show him how to follow Him and how to approach the whole dating scene as His follower. Two and half years later Louie and I married. The prayer group of single men were all still praying and still single. They all wondered why this new follower of Christ found his bride so quickly.

Louie came to Jesus when he was 31 years old. He had a whole lifetime of what he calls a living death. He was so grateful for the life he found in Jesus. That gratefulness and passion for Jesus propelled every area of his life. It propelled his manliness and passion. What does Jesus-following manliness look like? It is lived out in pursuing and rescuing. Protecting and loving. He pursued me and he got me. :) Our romance is another (long) story that I will save for another day.

The prayer group of single men were praying and waiting. They were not pursuing godly women. They were waiting on God to "give" them a wife. They were waiting on the Proverbs 31 woman. These men need to be told that life in Jesus for a man is denying self for the sake of others. It is pursuing Jesus and taking risks. It is living by passionate faith. Women long for these men to be passionate followers of Jesus.

Come on men! The world is waiting for you to man-up and pursue your Jesus. We need you!

*disclaimer* I'll be writing a call to single women tomorrow.

Love from the islands,
Twyla

P.S. I say if a man wants a Proverbs 31 woman, he better be a Proverbs 1-30 man. :)

Day One: A New Year A New Adventure

So this year I have resolved to keep a blog.  What?  


I have resisted.  
I have toyed with the idea.  
I even set up a template once only to chicken out.  


My own cynicism and judgemental attitude have kept me from this literary outlet.  


I love blogs.  
I read blogs. 
I judge blogs.  


Ugh.  I'm terrible.  Because of said confession I am beginning this adventure with fear and trembling.  Why would anyone want to know about my life?  What is so special about my life that would prompt people to even read this.  There is the rub.  I am stinking scared of disappointing someone or saying something ridiculous.


My hands are actually shaking as I write this. 
My stomach is turning.
I think I drank too much caffeine.  


I am an outgoing verbal communicator who longs to express myself.  I really want to do this.

I want to talk about my Jesus.
I want to brag on my kids and my latin man. 
I want to tell you about my caffeine obsession. 


So, today when a friend posted this link about doing something you have always wanted to do for 30 days, I took the bait. 

http://t.co/e5zzxjWn

I'm going to blog for 30 straight days to see if I completely embarrass myself, my kids and my latin man.

I hope I inspire you.
I hope I make you laugh.
I hope you don't judge me.  :)

Love from the islands,
Twyla